LoveOnLife
Can a person develop a mental illness through a broken heart? This question has been lingering on my mind for some time now. So I’ve decided to do some research on it. When I say research, I don’t mean searching the internet and scouring through countless books for answers. I mean talking with people who suffer from a broken heart. Then, get their feedback and compare it with the symptoms of people who suffer from a mental health illness. Through my research, I was able to learn that people who have suffered from a broken heart demonstrate similar symptoms and behaviors, if not the same as people who suffer from a mental health illness. I spoke with a wide variety of people of different ages and two different races, and I was able to hear their stories of how their broken hearts had, or still have, an effect on who they are.
I will share two of these experiences with you. One was a woman named Samantha, whom I spoke with. She had been in a relationship with her boyfriend for 10 years, from the age of 17 to the age of 27. They met while she was still in high school, and they were inseparable for the next 10 years. When Samantha was 27, her boyfriend was having a sexual relationship with one of his coworkers. She confronted him, and he denied it. Then, she stormed out. That was the last time Samantha spoke with him directly. He later sent for all his things and eventually moved from the city. Samantha, on the other hand, went into a very bad depression. She also developed imposter syndrome, constantly feeling like she was not good enough for anyone because there would always be someone better than her. Samantha is now 38, and she still takes medication for her depression and imposter syndrome.
The heart and the mind are very much connected. That is why specific thoughts of a particular time or someone can cause our heart to beat faster. The second story is my story. I was in a relationship with this girl who I thought I would be with for the rest of my life. She is an amazing person, and it did not work because of me, so she moved on. I’ve suffered from mental health episodes and I’ve suffered from a broken heart, and from my experience, it feels so much the same. Whenever I see her or hear her name, I get anxiety. My heartbeat speeds up, and I become so overwhelmed. When I have my schizophrenic episodes, my view of reality is entirely different from the one I am experiencing. When she left, everything reminded me of her.
I could not see the world for what it was. I could only see it for who she was. Sometimes, I would even hear her voice outside my window when I looked out, but it was someone else whose voice was a tad bit similar. Depression also set in for me. Suicide came to mind a couple of times. I guess still being able to see her kept me going. We are not together, but we have a child, so I still communicate with her sometimes. I recently told her I hear her voice sometimes, and she just smiled. I have been able to move on physically, but mentally and emotionally, there will always be a part of me that may never heal. It’s been some years ago, but I still get anxious around her. And sometimes, when I think about her, my heart still hurts, and it’s OK because I’m OK with not being OK. I really hope all my brothers of color really take this into consideration when I say this because due to our environment, we are taught to be tough and not deal with emotions, but this is wrong, especially when our emotions are affecting our mental health. So please, don’t brush off a broken heart. We must take time to understand our emotions to strengthen our mental state!
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